A Content Heart...

I missed the second two weeks of blogging about OBU, but hopefully I'll get those posts in later! I have really missed writing. It's not that I feel especially good at it, but it is an outlet for me, I think. I've missed it, so I am going to try hard to make time to keep my blog going!

I've been struggling with a content heart in some areas lately. First I need to list some of the many blessings God has put into my life lately - I am SO amazed when I try to count them...they are too overwhelming.

-I have a job...even when it is tough and challenging (every day) I have one.
-God sent a close friend here this year and we were able to be roommates and share an apartment. It is so nice to have someone to talk to, even if we don't get to see each other 100% of the time. My roommate is a Christian, and inspires me every day to strengthen my walk with Christ.
-I have family close by...even though my parents just moved to Germany for three years. It is so hard to have them far away, but my grandparents, aunt and uncle, and siblings all live within one-two hours driving distance, so what a blessing that is!
-I get to work with kids every day...even when it's challenging. God has given me a heart for kiddos.
-My parents have an American phone number...I can call them, even when they are across the world.
-I have a group of friends at work now. We are hanging out and planning fun things to do together regularly...and that alone can make the challenging days much better.
-I have the opportunity to go to school again...and to pay as I go instead of taking out more loans. (At least this semester...still praying about Spring - I'm taking one class now, but would like to take two then.)
-I've been leading music at my home church - it is such a joy to be there and be loved by the people I grew up with...but it is hard not to have my parents while I'm there.
-I've been getting lots more rest...I live in the community where I teach again instead of commuting 45 minutes each way every day. It feels like I have all the time in the world!
-I have a Creator who made me in His image, a Savior who loves me unconditionally, and a promise of hope, peace beyond understanding, and eternal life with Him!

So how then can I be discontent? I often lose sight of these daily things God has given me and focus on what others have. I put my selfish desires in front of myself instead of trusting in God's plan for me and His purpose for where I am now. It is hard to see friends getting married, and those who have been married for a few years now having children of their own. I sometimes wonder when God is going to introduce me to the man He has for me to spend my life with. I am enjoying this time in my life where I am single and have only myself to think of - lots of opportunities to travel and have fun, but I also long for that time when I will have a husband and a family of my own. I question whether someone will ever see me in that way. I cover my eyes and fill my mind with thoughts that I must have something wrong with me or maybe I'm in the wrong place, or any million other things I can think of...and while I know it's not true, that doesn't make it easy.

I'm being honest. So my prayer today is that God would fill my heart full again. I want to be full and overwhelmed by HIS love. I want to dance and rejoice in HIS promises. I want to be content in HIM and to know THAT is enough. It won't always be easy. It will take work. And it will take commitment and desire. But I desperately long to fall into His arms and experience true contentment and joy that can only come from the One who knows me better than I will ever know myself. I think it's only when I am fully content in HIS love that He will allow me to experience the earthly love and union of someone else.

"Let us hold unswervingly to the hope we profess, for He who promised is faithful." -Hebrews 10:23

My Last Name Starts With 'W'...and I'm So Thankful!

To say I had one favorite professor or staff member would be far from correct, and I'm sure many other Ouachita grads from over the years each face the same dilemma in trying to decide! When I saw the topic for today, though, a name came to mind right away. 

Ms. Diane Orsburn in the Financial Aid office. Diane is one of the first people I remember meeting at OBU. She handles student financial aid and loans....and assists families with last names starting with K-Z. During my first visit, I knew in my heart Ouachita was where I was going to go to college. What was I thinking, though?! It was a whole state away, and I had never even lived away from home in the same state for more than a week or two. And while it was a small, private, Christian university, that also came with a lot of dollar signs! 

From the moment Diane invited my parents and me into her office, she assured us if OBU was where God brought me, there would be a way for me to get there and stay!  Over the next five years she fulfilled her role in helping with financial aid, but she also provided so much more. All the smiles, encouraging words, genuine hugs, and concern were more than I could have ever asked for or expected from someone in an office at a university. I think that was one of the greatest things about OBU - we were more than just numbers and faces - so many people wholeheartedly cared about us as individuals. Diane knew my family, and she knew that once in awhile, I just needed a "mama's hug." She also knew my parents needed that assurance that their "baby" was going to be ok a whole state away...lol...

So, I have to say, I've never been so thankful to have a last name starting with letter "W." God knew all of the many people who would teach, influence, encourage, and shape me throughout my five years there, and Diane was one of many! Thank you to Diane, all of my wonderful professors, and to the staff! You were and are still a blessing to me! :)

How Do I Choose the Best of All?...

This month, my college is hosting a "BlogAbout" each Tuesday where alumni and students can reconnect and share about our alma mater. Today the topic is our favorite memory from OBU. Favorite. Memory. Singular...? I don't think that's possible! So...I think I'll highlight lots of favorite memories - quotes/words of others, events, and places. To some readers they'll mean nothing. To others, they'll bring a smile or a laugh. But to all of us blessed to spend a piece of our lives at Ouachita Baptist University, they'll help recreate that "common bond in an uncommon place" the admissions staff shared about with me during my first visit to campus. 

*"You come to Ouachita and be my girl..." - I still remember the words Mom Chu the very first time I visited campus. It was a Saturday morning, and the percussion teacher was giving me an "informal" tour of campus. As we knocked on her door and she invited us in with those words, I knew in my heart I really was going to be one of her girls!

*Tiger Blast - I was in the first Tiger Blast group in 2003 - drumline! And it really was just that...a blast! Seeing how far the group has come from then is so fun...I'm proud to be part of the first group!

*The Great Flood - during which the river covered the gazebo, and some of the guys decided to go floating on the practice fields with air mattresses...until Safety came and interrupted the fun...lol 

*Freaking people out with my "twin" picture in McClellan - If you know what I look like, you should take a field trip to the hallway of pictures between Mabee and McClellan...and see my twin named Alice. She is in a big frame with two smaller pictures - one of a man and one of her. I really should get a scholarship for being related or something! 

*Serenades - and the time the Betas decided to jump over the wall between Flippen and Perrin with balloons stuffed in their shirts to look like ladies. However, they quickly realized it is harder to jump over walls with extra "baggage" so they took the balloons out, threw them over the wall first, then jumped over and put them back in! It's not that easy for real ladies, boys! lol

*Festival of Christmas rehearsals - Better known as a lot of "FOCin" fun (and maybe a little torture!) ha

*My very first international mission trip (and first international trip at all) - Senegal West Africa with the Campus Ministries group - Laura-Mo was our leader, and a group of us traveled there May 20-June 10, 2006. My life will never be the same. And a piece of my heart is still there. Through that trip, I realized God has placed a calling in my heart for mission work!

*Singing a Mozart Requiem with the 100+ voice Concert Choir - A.MA.ZING!

*The Wellness swim test - a requirement to graduate...I passed...barely...enough said! 

*First Baptist Arkadelphia - my family for the five years I spent there

*Picnics by the river

*Snow - the first and only one of two snows during my five years there! (Nothing like the snow surprise this past winter!) It was Valentine's Day 2004 - a Saturday morning, and though it didn't stick much and there wasn't more than an inch, you better bet we were out playing in it, throwing it and sliding down the hill on "borrowed" cafeteria trays! (Ok I didn't participate in the sledding part, but I do remember it! haha) The second snow was during my last semester there - and I think it came in March. Just enough for my student teaching school to have a snow day....and everyone else at OBU to have class. It was a fun day off! :)

*The "Most Exciting Band in Tiger Land!" - I was in the drumline four of my five years there, and there will never be anything again quite like the rush of coming out on that field ready to get the crowd's attention! And nothing quite like all the sweaty practices either...

*Being the only girl snare drummer - My freshman year...another memory from band, but a big one - as the only girl snare drummer, I was the reason the boys couldn't have practices in their dorm...yes, they had to come all the way across campus to the music building because of "that dumb girl..." ha - oh well, it was good for them! 

*Education classes - so many memories of great classmates, making notebooks, challenging professors, and lots of learning...and of course, who could forget the "Five C's" and "The Block?!" I was in the group of student teachers to experience the last "Block" (three weeks of 8-5 intensive study and classes before going out to student teach) at OBU. 

*Homecoming 2007 - I got to be one of the representatives, and it was just exciting to be a part of it all

*TWIRP 2007 - After four years at OBU, I FINALLY got brave enough to ask a friend to go...we went to the "Play Date" evening with kids' games and activities. I also got invited to the Chiote Date Night that semester too...another fun memory.

*Trips to Lake Degray, Hot Springs, and Little Rock

*Chick-Fil-A and Starbucks- and all the random conversations, laughs, and sometimes even cries I had there with friends 

*Mass Junk Mail days - Hey it was just nice to have something in the mailbox, you know? We always knew coming down the steps of the student center it was one of those days because of the brightly colored stream of papers decorating the inside of the closest garbage cans...ha

*Watching the guys "slack-line" between the trees in front of Cone Bottoms - or whatever that fancy rope walking thing is called...lol...then when I saw other guys doing it my fifth year there, I wanted to say, "Hey - you aren't first...there were cooler guys who did that first here, you know?!" 

*Tiger Jam - the basketball pep band...and our many "creative" cheers and uh, "distractions" to the other teams...the best memory ever is of a coach from the opposing team who was not being very "polite" with his words and actions. He had on a very 1980s sweater vest, and one of the guys in our crowd (who I admit was also not very polite) shouted, "Hey Coach! Mr. Belvedeer called and he wants his sweater vest back!" Oh man, we could have all rolled laughing! 

*The Gum Tree - by the old bridge that went to Daniel. I'm still sad to see it all gone, though the new developments are pretty and fancy...I remember seeing it on move in day when my room mate who had been there before pointed it out as she stuck her gum on it when we crossed the bridge

*Open Dorm Night - yes, when I was there it only happened once a semester for 3 hours on a Saturday night, and it rotated - girls dorms/guys dorms. By the time I graduated I think it was any night all week for either gender with check-in at the desk and doors left open, of course. 

*Accidentally driving to Gurdon - during the New Student Retreat the month before I moved there. My room mate for the retreat borrowed a friend's car, and we were headed to Mc Donalds late at night...or so we thought - until we wound up in Gurdon at the creepy Industrial Park where we had to turn around and drive back to Arkadelphia. We finally did make it to Mc Donalds by the way! :)

*The #1 Taco Salad in Bismarck! (It's still there - go check it out! haha)

*COPE (Community Outreach Program through English) -  with Mrs. Cosh, Mrs. Jones, and several other wonderful staff and students...we spent a few hours together each Tuesday night teaching ESL and building relationships with internationals from our campus, HSU, and the community. What a blessing that was to me... I miss it so much!

*Meeting friends, family, and professors who impacted me for a lifetime with memories, learning, and growth that has changed me forever! 

I couldn't possibly list every memory here...and I'm sure there are many I have forgotten, but you've probably been reading awhile! I am thankful for the memories I do have...for the way that God led me to that little university at the end of my senior year of high school and how he provided every step of the way for me to be there. I love what Ouachita means to me and the place it will always have in my life and my heart! Thanks for reading...I'm looking forward to blogging again next week and to reading everyone else's memories too!

A Mirror

Well, the good news is - my computer is finally up and running. The past few weeks have been a whirlwind as I've finished one of the best summers I have ever had, started a new year of teaching, begun my own pursuit to further my education, and sought to dig deeper into spending more time with God and learn just what it is He has in store for me now. His purpose. His will. His perfect plans He promises to reveal to me as I walk with Him.

So, as I sit here typing, and enjoying the beautiful sunshine and breeze blowing across the tall grass and trees outside my window, the chance to have a day off and relax - it is exciting for me to be able to write again. To think about the verse that first inspired me to name this blog.

"So all of us who have had that veil removed can see and reflect the glory of the Lord. And the Lord - who is the Spirit - makes us more and more like Him as we are changed into His glorious image." -2 Corinthians 3:18

I don't know about you, but that verse challenges me. The very One who created all of the Earth wants me to be His child. To rest in Him. To BE LIKE Him. And then I think about all of the people I see and influence each day. Whether through words, actions, a smile, a wave, teaching, or some other way - big or small. I think, if I am to reflect His image...to truly be like Jesus, I need to know more about how He looks. I need to spend time reading His word in the Bible and reflecting on how He wants to use my life to reveal Himself to others. I want to see how His hand has been ever-present in my life so far, and how it is reaching out to lead me in my future.

Exciting!

And my heart so breaks right now for children all around the world who are in need of His love. Who don't know there is someone waiting to comfort them and wrap them in His arms and love them in a way no one else ever could. My heart still longs to go, to share, to open eyes to that love. Then God opens my eyes and shows me - you are here. And I have given you 560 children to love and teach and show my joy and reflection every day in school where you are at. I have given you the responsibility to lead a children's group at church and share a heart for the world with them so that they might one day also grow a passion for sharing the truth here and around the world. God please use me to be the reflection all of these children and other people I encounter here need to get just a glimpse of who you are. Make me a joyful living example of your love. A genuine servant and follower.

So...I have a lot of catching up to do in writing about my summer and all the many ways God has blessed me and helped me to grow. I have a wedding to share about, an amazing summer job, new friends, visits with old friends, precious children, and lots of traveling. And I will do my best to keep writing about those things and sharing pictures soon, because what wonderful experiences and memories they are to share! But for now, I challenge you to take a minute and sit...to think on the many ways God is working in you and through you. And to be a reflection of who He is no matter where you are.

It's good to be back!

Aaaaah! I have missed blogging so much! And reading everyone's blogs. But summer has been AMAZING and so worth not quite having the time to keep up, although I'm looking forward to reading the ones I've missed soon. And...my computer has been a little...not so well lately! But today it is working perfectly for some reason (for which I am thankful!) So if it continues, I may try to write a REAL post later this evening! Happy Sunday, everyone! :)

Still Here!

Hey everyone! I'm still here...just having a super busy (and amazing!) summer! I am enjoying Ridgecrest Conference Center SO much, and the Lord truly blessed me by providing the opportunity to work here this summer! The mountains are beautiful, the other summer staffers are so much fun - new friensdhips! and I am really enjoying the 3s/4s in the preschool groups I'm working with during each conference!

This past week we did not have a conference, so I took a few days off instead of working in another area and traveled to D.C. to visit some wonderful friends from college. It was so great to catch up, and amazing to see our nation's capitol for the first time! (I hope I spelled the right version of capitol! lol)

God is so good, and I really can't wait to write in more detail about all that has been going on. However, my personal computer started having issues last week, and the next two weeks finishing out the summer here will be really busy, so I probably won't get to post again until I am home. Just know I'm thinking about all of you who I know read my blog, and also looking forward to catching up on your blogs as I have time! I should be back in Missouri in about 2.5 weeks and am looking forward to some new things going on there too - the main one being that I will have a room mate, and we'll be moving into our apartment August 4th! :)

I guess that's all for now - have a joyful summer, and remember to be still and trust in the One who has great plans for each of us! I am learning so much more about Him each day...

Blessings to you!

Today...

I packed all my things (and extra things, and extra extra things...lol) for camp and loaded up my car...
Then I said goodbye to my parents and our cat. And our house. And my neighborhood. And my hometown. Where we've lived since I was one year old (minus a year when we moved to another town in Missouri, but we came back!)
And it was weird. And kind of hard. But it was quick. It was like all the packing and sorting and hauling, and packing....just sort of ended abruptly, I gave my parents hugs, took a few pictures...and left.
My parents are moving to Germany while I'm gone. I'm excited for their new adventures...but a little sad to say goodbye to places and things I've known my whole life.
Not that I won't be back. I only live 45 minutes away and still have friends there. But...it's just not the same.

On a more fun and positive note - I drove through four states in 6.5 hours today - Missouri, Illinois, Kentucky, and Tennessee. It was pretty exciting. I'm on an adventure. God is at work all around me in my life - things are changing, growing pains are hurting...and I'm right where I'm supposed to be. That's what I thought about as I drove today. And I thought about how adventurous I really am...it doesn't make me nervous to drive by myself to far away places. I actually kind of enjoy it!

Tomorrow I'll make the most beautiful part of the drive! 5.5 hours through the Smoky Mountains of Tennessee and into the Appalachian (I hope that's the right name) range of North Carolina! :) I'll meet new friends who I get to spend the next six weeks with...and start training for my summer job. I'm so excited!

I may not have Internet access all the time - so the posts might be limited...but I'll be back when I can! :) Happy Summer to everyone!

P.S....If you want to send me some mail (hint hint!) you can write:
My Name (I feel weird putting my first and last name out on my blog, but most of you know me!) =)
Summer Staff
P.O. Box 128
Ridgecrest, NC
28770

I'll even write back...because who doesn't love getting snail mail, these days?!

I'll try to post pictures from my big trip soon too! :)

Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!!

LOL - I feel like the kid on Home Alone 2! If you haven't seen it, or the first one, he screams like that a lot.

I was going to write about something else...but I couldn't resist writing about what I am doing right now.
In April I volunteered to go to a three day ELL (English Language Learner) training in St. Louis. It was district-paid for, so that was even better!

So...now that is how I found myself here at a fancy hotel - walking into the lobby to check in, wearing jean shorts and flip flops...and feeling a little bit lost! I can only be thankful I knew how to walk through the revolving door...without falling on my face or something! I had to exchange my car keys for a temporary "10 minute parking chip" and then when I went back out I had to take a ticket to the parking area so I could get in the little gate. I am staying on the 8th floor, and it costs $12.95 per day to use the Internet if I am in my room....that is a lot of money to pay just to use the Internet in your pajamas. So - I dressed up (if you could call my school teaching clothes dressy...I think the atmosphere here is more "classy" ha) and came to the lobby to use free Internet. I think my school district will appreciate that budget-conscious choice! lol

Don't worry...I haven't jumped on the bed, done cannon balls in the swimming pool, or run up the room service bill. And I haven't been chased by any creepy guys with gold teeth! Yet. Haha. But I do still have two more nights for adventure! ;)

Here's to life in the big city...at least for a couple of days! lol

I'm So Vain...You Probably Think This Post is About Me...

Sorry for the corny title - I did something kind of vain today.

Well...I wasn't just trying to be vain. It was actually something kind of fun and just for myself, but I felt a little vain about it, especially when I handed the lady my debit card and paid for it. I got a spray tan. Yes, I paid to turn myself a different color...lol...

I do not tan on my own. I burn, peal, and repeat. lol So I decided to be brave and give it a try.

This weekend a best friend from high school is getting married, and I am the maid of honor. And my dress is dark purple...and strapless....and short. And I am white. Very white. And who wants to be the only thing whiter than the bride's dress blinding people from the altar? lol

It wasn't so bad...I'm still waiting to see the final results. And my biggest fear hasn't come true...yet. No orange Ooompa Loompa nightmares.

It was one of those times my dad would use his phrase, "It's just not necessary..." but I had fun. And tomorrow I'm going to a day spa with the other wedding party girls where we will be pampered even more with manicures and pedicures...I could get used to this life...good thing it's too expensive to get used to! lol

We'll see how the tan turns out. For now, at least the bride won't have to enter to the song "Blinded by the White..." I mean, uh..."Light" hahaha Maybe I'll post a picture soon!

Just Thinking...

I wonder where I thought I would be at 26...
I can think of some things I always assumed when I was younger.

I thought I would be finished with college (as a lawyer, nurse, secretary, teacher, doctor, speech pathologist, early childhood specialist, music teacher, and many more....in no particular order - but it's funny to see how they changed over the years...)

I thought I would be married and possibly have children. I even assumed this all the way through high school. Getting married just seemed like something people did in college, so naturally I thought I would too. (I'm still waiting...)

I thought I would drive a fancy car (maybe a yellow Mustang convertible!)

I thought I would have lots of friends and spend lots of time socializing. (Different times have brought different friends, but God has been good to bless me with strong friendships throughout...)

I thought I would live near my family but travel anywhere I wanted to. (I do right now, and I have traveled a lot!)

I thought I would be a writer. (Well...I have a blog, when I actually take the time to write here! haha)

But did I know...

I would be a music teacher with my own classroom and love so many kids every day?

That I'd be an aunt...times ten (soon to be eleven?!) (These pictures only show five of my ten nieces and nephews...I'm missing pics of my Fabulous Five nieces!)

That I would travel the world, have a heart for missions, and fall in love with the most beautiful people and continent in the world?! (I'm not trying to be too bias...but I DO have a BIG place in my heart for Africa!!!)

I would be an Amazon alligator hunter and an adventurous drum girl? (I did not catch the gator in that picture by the way, but I did hold him, and he was alive! lol)

I would love serving others and have the opportunity to be a part of First Baptist Church Arkadelphia throughout college and help with their Arms Around Arkadelphia ministry even after I graduated?...

I would have some of the best friends I could ask for - some from elementary through high school, and some from college?...

I would carry my camera everywhere and love taking pictures of everything - especially the beauty of God's creation?

That I would one day be maid of honor for one of those lifelong high school friends I mentioned earlier? (And plan showers and do other fun maid of honor things for my first time ever!)  =)

There are so many more things I never could have imagined would be at 26...and so many things I did imagine and have yet to experience. One thing I am as sure of as ever is that I have a good and faithful God. And that He created me and has continued to shape me into the woman He wants me to be over 26 years. He continues to help me learn and grow every day. 

As my birthday came this year, I thought about how I was actually looking forward to being 26. There wasn't anything particularly exciting about that number, but I truly feel like I'm becoming an adult. I have been out of college for three years now, working and living on my own, and I'm really enjoying that. God gives us different seasons in our lives, and even though it's not always easy, and I long for other seasons that are yet to come, I love where I am at now. 26!